Stroke, or a Ghost?

Since October, the spookiest month of the year, is officially upon us, I'm going to spend the weeks leading up to Halloween only posting scary things. Like this spooksy tale, which took place just last night. After reading it, let me know if you think it sounds more like a stroke or a ghost, and whichever one gets more votes is the one I'll go with.

Because I value your opinion.

You delightful thing, you.

Anyway. Last night I was watching Arrested Development while looking at internets, as ya do, when I noticed that somehow, it seemed the lower left corner of my vision had been cut off. When I glanced down at my feet, my left ankle disappeared. I looked in the bathroom mirror, and my left hand was gone. 

Almost as if . . . I were becoming invisible. 

Hipster Ghost has never felt so alive. Ironic!

My vision returned soon enough, bringing with it a pounding headache. To be honest, though, I kind of missed my wonky vision. It was sort of nice, knowing that if I ever wanted to keep a secret from myself but tell everyone else, I could just write it very small in the lower left corner of a letter. I'd never know it was there!

But that was not to be. I'll never be able to keep plans for my own surprise party secret from me.

Dejected, I started getting ready for bed. However, the eye problem was soon replaced by a tingling in my left middle finger. I thought some mouth wash had made its way under my fingernail, but by the time I was under the covers, the numbness had spread to my entire hand and jumped up to the left side of my mouth. Trying to remain calm while sweating an inordinate amount, I grabbed the nearest interwebs and looked up symptoms for a stroke; although I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't have been able to manage a Google search in the middle of an actual stroke. But this was no time for reason.

Symptoms of a Stroke 

(interspersed with my increasingly hysterical train of thought)

1. Sudden tingling or numbness of arm, leg, or face - especially on one side of the body.

Usually both my arms go numb together, like when I sleep with my arms above my head and then wake up with Kermit arms flopping about as I try to shut off my alarm clock. Although thank goodness it's only one side with a stroke, because if I have to go to the hospital, I'm going to need at least one hand to put some pants on first.

2. Sudden trouble seeing in one or both eyes.

That did happen. In one or both of my eyes! God, it's like they know me.

3. Sudden severe headache.

All of these symptoms are sudden. I should have expected a stroke today - why wasn't I more alert?! Always expect a stroke! I could have prepared for this instead of spending all day trying to figure out the actual lyrics to Red Hot Chili Peppers songs!

4. Sudden trouble walking, dizziness, loss of balance or coordination.

Wait, strokes happen to old people. The only person I've even heard of having a stroke at my age is Aubrey Plaza. But, she's okay now, and plus she's famous and really funny . . . so this could be alright - I could write a darkly comedic memoir about my stroke and then everyone will want to be just like me and have strokes! 

5. Trouble forming coherent thoughts.

As I sat up quickly to call The Boy so he could take me to the hospital, I felt something like a cold gust of air as the feeling snapped back into my arm all at once. I wiggled my fingers and looked in the mirror to make sure one side of my face didn't droop when I smiled.

Everything was normal. It was over, as suddenly as it began. As if the numbness had been expelled from my body. Or, you might say . . . exorcised from it. 

WHAT IF that tingling in my fingertips had been nothing more than a bashful ghost trying to hold my hand? And the left side of my mouth went numb at the touch of a little ghost kiss? I don't think it's such a ridiculous idea that a ghost could have a crush on a human. Ghosts are people, too. Or, they were, once.

I'd tell you how I feel about you, but . . . I'm shy.

So now, tell me what you think. Was it a blood clot, or maybe a neurological spasm, or just a little spirit who wanted to be friends?

Not that I'm trying to sway your opinion or anything, but whatever it was did leave this little gem up in Paint for me to find when I woke up. It's a little sloppy, but what can you expect from someone who doesn't have a body?

Carrie + Ghost. Foreverrrr.

Images via [theo]culture, Collider.com.