Introductions

"Um, hi. So, two interesting things about myself ... well, I have twice the number of sweat glands as the average human? And sometimes I dream that I have no fingernails," she whispered, and sat down quickly.

Making friends has always been tough for Carrie. She does better on the internet, where people can't see her mangled limbs or hear her oddly high-pitched stutter, but her debilitating social fears and darkly offensive sense of humor still make her a target of mockery wherever she goes.

The beard can't help matters any.

Because of this sad state of affairs, she has chosen to become a writer - that most solitary of professions, second only to Hermiting About - and has started this blog for you. For you, in particular, to read. In hopes that maybe, someday, you will be able to look past her physical deformities and personality defects and learn to love her, just a little bit.

Alternatively, she has considered marrying a disgustingly wealthy old man so she can just buy some friends instead. This method is actually preferred, as she is also exceedingly lazy.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME, STRANGER?



Image via eBaum's World.